A divorce is one of the most devastating things than you can ever experience, especially if you have children. Your own heartbreak is bad enough, but now you also have to watch your precious kids experience the stress of the situation. During this difficult time, it’s hard to keep things together. The steps you take after your divorce will determine how you will regroup and rejoin life.
1. Break The News Gently
When it comes time to tell your kids about the divorce, you should be as gentle as possible. This means that you should keep any anger, blame or other forms of negativity between you and your soon-to-be ex at a minimum. Instead of getting into the details of the cause of the separation, try simply explaining that sometimes, adults who were once in love decide that they are better off as friends. Also explain that when this happens, the adults choose to live separately, meaning that the kids will be spending time with Mommy and Daddy in two different places.
Naturally, the way you present this information will be dependent on the age and maturity level of your kids, but no matter what, be sure to reinforce the idea that nothing they did played any role in this decision. As a parent, it’s your job to put on a happy face and keep going for the sake of your kids. Being open with your emotions is fine, as it encourages your kids to be open with theirs. This is all part of the ‘regroup process’ for you and the children.
2. Talk With a Life Coach
As strange as it sounds, a divorce can actually be an amazing opportunity. You are now single and have to answer to no one. This means that you can start your life over and be anything that you want to be. If you’d like some help with rejoining process, consider contacting a life coach. Whether it’s a life coach in Pittsburgh PA or a coach in your area, they will have the tools and wisdom to guide you through your divorce and help you turn a new page. When you do, you will be more capable than ever of being a great parent.
3. Reach Out to Your Friends
Your friends, especially those who have children of their own, will be a great resource to you. These are the people you can rant and cry to and finally, rejoice with. If you and your ex were together for a long time, many of your mutual friends may be forced to pick sides. Therefore, if nothing else, a divorce can show you who is most loyal to you. When it’s all said and done, the friends who are still in your life are there because they love and care about you very deeply. Take advantage of that and lean on them.
No matter how much you try to keep things positive, your divorce will have an effect on you and your children. However, if you remain steady, be a responsible parent and take the necessary steps to move on from your divorce, you’ll find the process will flow smoother and you will be a stronger person after the dust settles.
Nadine Swayne shares these informative steps for those coping with divorce. Life coaches, found online at sites like Noomii.com, can help with all aspects of your life, even the end of a marriage. Whether you need a life coach in Pittsburgh PA or a coach in your town, they will be able to bring you thru this difficult time of your life, only to make you strong and shine in the end!