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5 Ways Living as a Zombie Beats Normal Life

By: Donna Chaffins | Date: September 25, 2014 | Categories: Humor

Zombies make great camping budies

Everyone that knows me knows I love horror movies. And I’m especially fond of zombie movies and shows. The Walking Dead is one of my favorites! Can’t wait for the new season to start. This got me to thinking about zombies (and I’ve written about zombies several times here on my blog) and ways living as a zombie beats normal life (and in the spirit of Halloween coming up)….

Zombie living is not like everyday life at all. The worries of how you are going to make it from day to day are lost on you as you wander through the afternoon looking for brains. In fact, the zombies have it a little bit better than we do in some ways. If living as a zombie sounds horrible to you, consider the following:

Zombies never get scared

Have you ever watched a zombie from a distance? You can throw anything at them including a bullet and they will just keep on lumbering along. Nothing makes them fearful or afraid. They simply moan and keep on chasing. That has to be a bit liberating, no?

Zombies have simple dinner plans

We all know what it is like to try and plan dinner with a large family. Asking everyone what they would like is like roulette for your nervous system. Zombies know what they are having for dinner at all times and they only worry about securing it. I wish I only ate one thing and my dinner plans were so simple. (perhaps not brains…maybe something like chocolate)

Zombies don’t have to get dressed every day

We all know how we love those days off where we get to run around our homes in our yoga pants. Zombies live their entire lives like that. No worries about embarrassing angles or things showing…. they simply let it all loose and roll with it. I can only imagine what that freedom feels like.

Zombies don’t have to earn a living

If you are a zombie, you don’t need currency. What are you going to buy? Better still, who is going to sell you anything? Your life is simplified a great deal when you only live for brains and flesh. You don’t even have to go to work each day.

Zombies never worry about how they age

I wish I had the self confidence of a zombie. A zombie walks around with half an eyeball, missing teeth and a really bad odor and never feels upset about it. They can ignore the name brand on their sneakers and simply be who they are. You never see a zombie putting on airs.

Zombies are actually fairly noble when you think about it. They never pretend to be someone they are not. They are too simple for that. Yes, they will eat you and turn you into one of them, but at least they are honest about it. Zombies do have some advantages, huh?

13 Responses to 5 Ways Living as a Zombie Beats Normal Life

  1. Dana says:

    haha funniest thing i’ve read today

  2. Jenn E says:

    I saw the title and was a bit confused. But now I see! Such a funny lighthearted post – very true points you have here though too! It definitely made me smile! Thanks!

  3. Marissa says:

    That’s hilarious! But what about the smell?

  4. Istvánné V. says:

    Hahaha, that made my day! Thanks for sharing!:)

  5. Judy Thomas says:

    Lol! Love it, thank you, you made my day.

  6. I want to be a zombie then! Hahahaha.

  7. Linda Manns Linneman says:

    My grandson loves zombies. This is a cute article with some cute points for zombies

  8. Tammy says:

    lol cute post. I think I’d prefer the encumbrances that come with being living, despite how much time being a Zombie may save me from making decisions 😉

  9. MeryeBeth Albert says:

    FINALLY! A blogpost for my people! Being a “zombie” myself, I believe you hit most of the high points of our “lifestyle”,which, by the way, is a choice. Thank you for shining a light on our community. AARGH!

  10. ivan p says:

    hahaha. funny. people actually don’t look at the bright side if they talk about zombies.

  11. Dorothy Boucher says:

    bahhahaaha too funny but still I don’t want to be a zombie nor do I want to see one lol.. I don’t like scary movies , yes I am a baby heheh Thanks for share

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