Cougar Anti-Aging Defense Fund

Guest Post

Death is a scary thing, so it’s no surprise that any outward signs of aging can remind people that one day they will be 6 feet underground.  Some of us turn to spirituality to ease this anxiety, others turn to plastic surgery.  However, church is usually free, and plastic surgery is not, so I have conducted a recent study on what exactly women of a more “advanced age” allocate their money to in an attempt to shed some light on this phenomenon.

If your girlfriend/wife happens to be what is known in the soft sciences as a “cougar,” then you may often find yourself wondering what exactly she is spending exorbitant amounts of money on each month.  There’s nothing to fear, however, because all of her money is being allocated to things completely necessary for her survival.  Below is a chart of the most common expenditures gathered from a recent study conducted on a sample population of cougars in the Orange County, Ca area.  A lot of these expenditures may seem superfluous to you, but try to keep in mind that most of these expenses are necessary expenditures in the fight against time and gravity.  And as we all know, time is the most formidable opponent of all… time, so it’s not surprising that it is also the most financially demanding.

Click on infographic to enlarge

Chase Beckwith is a writer for Diet Diva.