30 Days About Me Day 20: Something I wish I could forget

Toni from A Daily Dose of Toni, is hosting this 30 Days About Me challenge and today is day 20. And yes, it is Sunday and this should have been posted yesterday. I'm running behind. I should be all caught up by tomorrow. Today's topic is "Something I wish I could forget."

This was easy to think of, but difficult to talk about. Something I wish I could forget, happened on June 2, 1992. My grandmother had been sick for a long time, and had spent most of the last several months of her life in a hospital. 

She had been diagnosed with bone cancer and she was also a diabetic. My mom, my aunt, and I were on rotation. My mom spent every day with her, and my aunt and I alternated the night shift. 

On that day in June, the doctors had called the entire family in… her time was at end.  What made this day incredibly difficult was not only my heartache for my mom – this was her mom – and I can't imagine that kind of loss, but I was sitting by my grandmother's bedside holding her hand as she passed away. I remember the feeling. Logically, I knew she was gone, but I didn't want to let go of her hand. I didn't want to accept it.

I wish I could forget that feeling… the feeling of life slipping away.

Even though I wish I could foget that day, my grandma had a life full of love. Her children and her grandchildren loved her. My mom  was always there for her. She even lived with us for a time. I have good memories of my grandma. She was quite funny, unintentionally usually, which made her that much funnier. She always referred to my, now hubby, as Craig (his name is Greg). It still makes me smile.

So although I wish I could forget that day… it will not fog my good memories.